Ian Thomas Malone

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Saturday

14

November 2015

0

COMMENTS

Spectre Is Daniel Craig’s For Your Eyes Only

Written by , Posted in Blog, Pop Culture

What are action movies supposed to be in the year 2015? There’s the Mission Impossible and The Fast and the Furious series which defy age and logic to introduce one exciting installment after another. There comes a point where mere excitement simply isn’t good enough. How else can we explain the lukewarm reaction to Avengers: Age of Ultron, a painfully uninspired entry into the increasingly uninspiring Marvel franchise? With James Bond, we have the task at hand to determine where the gold standard of long running franchises fits into the modern age.

Unlike many critics, I hated Skyfall. While the film was largely praised for deviating from the standard 007 mold, I disliked M’s prominence in the central narrative. As much as a I like Dame Judi Dench, I’m a purist in the sense that I don’t believe any actor is larger than their role. Such a sendoff was most unnecessary and came at the expense of Javier Bardem’s theoretically interesting Raoul Silva.

Craig’s 007 films have cared more about continuity than the rest of the Bond canon. Spectre awkwardly tries to tie the events of the past three films together and largely falls flat with those efforts. Like Bardem before him, Christoph Waltz is tethered to an unnecessary need to be more than a standard Bond villain. By tying his backstory into Bond’s, the film attempts to heighten his emotion impact, but the results are merely distracting. For the second consecutive film, the Bond series has cast an Academy Award winner as the villain only to waste them in senseless clutter.

Around the halfway marker, I started to make the connections to For Your Eyes Only, Roger Moore’s fifth entry into the series. Both films have well put together action sequences and neither passes up a single opportunity to interject humor into the dialogue. Critical reception of For Your Eyes Only varies, with “fun” and “forgettable” accurately summarizing both sides of the equation. Also worth noting that FYEO features a “cameo” of sorts for Waltz’ character, though legal issues prevented the film from acknowledging the character as Ernst Stavro Blofeld.

Coming off of Skyfall, it might have been unreasonable to expect Spectre to raise the bar in terms of the plot. Adding complexity to Bond can produce dangerous, or rather painfully boring, results. The real question is, did it even try?

The film isn’t without its redeeming qualities. Besides the well crafted action scenes, Lea Seydoux shines as Dr. Madeline Swann. Ralph Fiennes, Naomie Harris, and Ben Whinshaw all put in fine efforts, but none top their Skyfall performances, which is disappointing at least for Fiennes, who takes over for Dench as M and fails to bring even half of Dench’s commanding energy to the role.

As for Craig, it’s hard to criticize him. He’s comfortable, but he should be by his fourth go around. Uninspiring could be a word used to describe his performance, but that also speaks to the film in general.

Spectre’s biggest crime isn’t that it’s conventional. It falters because it doesn’t fully commit to being a fun movie. The film tries too hard to justify its legitimacy as a post Die Another Day Bond film that it forgets that it’s okay not to be revolutionary. Traditional and boring are two different things. I’m not sure Spectre could tell the difference.

Friday

6

November 2015

0

COMMENTS

Breaking Down Why The Bastard Executioner Is So Unwatchable

Written by , Posted in Blog, Pop Culture

We’re living in a wonderful time for the action/fantasy costume drama. There’s never been so much to choose from. Regardless of whether you want to watch something that’s going to be a Emmy contender (Game of Thrones, Penny Dreadful, hopefully Outlander next year), something with well choreographed fight scenes (Vikings, The Last Kingdom, Black Sails), or merely something to fall asleep to after a second nightcap (Olympus), there’s something for everyone.

The Bastard Executioner should have been a welcome addition to the second tier. A historical drama created by Kurt Sutter, the man who brought us Sons of Anarchy, had all the makings of a show that would fit in well with the current mix of offerings.

It doesn’t. It’s not just a bad show, it’s a downright unwatchable travesty. Calling it worse than Marco Polo is almost insulting to the underwhelming Netflix entry to the genre.

It took me a few weeks to figure out why this show is this bad and it’s not because the show had perhaps the worst name in television history. It’s not even that the show has bland characters and feels highly derivative. The Last Kingdom has essentially the same plot as Vikings and is still an excellent new show (worth noting that TLK is based off of a series of novels by Bernard Cornwell, which makes the similarities more acceptable).

I’ve seen four episodes of the show and I’ve found it hard to care about anyone on the program. Even Stephen Moyer, who can’t seem to make anything work with the bland writing. As much as I enjoy Katey Sagal, her character is unbearable with that completely baffling accent. Her character looks like something out of The Legend of the Seeker, which is hardly a compliment for a show on a network like FX (though I enjoyed Seeker and The Sword of Truth books its based on).

The show has no obvious likable characters. No Tyrion, no Jon, no Ragnar, no Floki. Just a bunch of crappy generic characters with generic names. There’s no fun to be had at all with this lot.

Some shows take time to develop, even the ones that were good from the get-go. Game of Thrones, Vikings, and Outlander are all different programs now than when they started (which would be a bit unusual in Outlander’s case if it wasn’t following its source material). Problem is, The Bastard Executioner makes it downright impossible for you to actually get through the episodes.

As we learned with the last few seasons of Sons of Anarchy, Kurt Sutter is not a man who likes to be edited. Since 2012, SOA episodes almost always ran for at least 90 minutes on commercial TV, often longer. This trend has unfortunately continued with The Bastard Executioner.

It takes the saying “too much of a good thing” to a whole new level. It’s too much of a terrible thing. A show trying to work through its growing pains doesn’t need to air episodes that are longer than most HBO shows on a regular basis. I assume Sutter has a fair amount of pull at FX. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work to the benefit of the show.

While I’d say the long run times are the show’s biggest problem, the fight scenes are very subpar. They’re sloppy and have way too much gore. You can’t exactly blame the budget either, when fellow non-premium cable show Vikings produces the most consistently great fight scenes on television.

I’d imagine that Sutter set out to beat Vikings at its own game. I don’t think he seriously expected a show with the title, The Bastard Executioner, to be an Emmy contender. While Vikings isn’t going to challenge for Best Drama either, it has grown into one of the best shows on TV with amazing visuals, great action, and most importantly, compelling characters.

The Bastard Executioner has no redeeming qualities and that’s a shame. Sutter should have been able to do better than this. If his ego is half as bloated as his show’s run time, it’s possible he’s oblivious to how terrible the finished product is.

Wednesday

16

September 2015

5

COMMENTS

The Red Sox Are In For An Interesting Offseason

Written by , Posted in Blog, sports

With the Red Sox currently battling the Rays for last place in the AL East, it’s only natural that many fans have turned their attention to the offseason. Dave Dombrowski has vowed to acquire a number one starter, which tends to suggest that it will be an exciting offseason for the Red Sox. A look at their payroll obligations tends to paint a different picture.

The Sox already have 125 million tied up in ten players for 2015. Those players are Hanley Ramirez, Rick Porcello, Pablo Sandoval, David Ortiz, Dustin Pedroia, Wade Miley, Koji Uehara, Rusney Castillo, Ryan Hannigan, and … Allen Craig. Note this number does not include Clay Buchholz, whose 13 million dollar contract will likely be picked up. So essentially, we’re looking at eleven players making 138 million.

Now, we shouldn’t expect significant salaries for Mookie Betts, Xander Bogaerts, Jackie Bradley Jr., Blake Swihart, Brock Holt, Joe Kelly, or Eduardo Rodriguez, who aren’t likely to make more than ten million combined. Junichi Tazawa should make somewhere around five if he’s tendered a contract. With pretty much all the key positions covered, the question becomes, where does that leave us?

There are a couple names who come up as trade possibilities. We hear Sandoval commonly named as a candidate for a “bad contract swap,” but Hannigan is a guy who could be traded to save a bit of cash. 3.7 million is a bit steep for a backup catcher, but the team may want to have a veteran around for Swihart and/or Christian Vasquez. The team would presumably wish to get rid of Porcello, Craig, and Hanley, but that seems highly unrealistic. We’re looking at maybe 25-35 million in potentially available resources if they don’t want to go past the 180 million mark.

Free agent pitchers such as David Price, Johnny Cueto, Jordan Zimmerman, and likely Zach Grienke will all be seeking mega deals that would eat up most of those available resources. Some of that money should be spent on re-enforcing the bullpen and the cost of decent relievers has gone up quite a bit. A pitcher with a 20+ million AAV seems like a very poor investment, even if the deal is back loaded, which would ease the burden for 2016.

So what to do? The two most obvious options are to either increase payroll or acquire a player via trade. Trade would likely be the preferable route, but then the question becomes, who’s available?

The introduction of the second Wild Card has made it far more difficult to get talent via trade, especially in the offseason. Fewer teams are willing to enter the season prepared to lose. The Sox do have one of the best farm systems in the Majors. Top tier talent can be acquired, but it’s not going to come cheap. Tyson Ross and James Shields of the Padres and Indians’ starters Corey Kluber and Carlos Carrasco seem like achievable, albeit costly targets. Oakland could be enticed to trade some pitching as well.

A potential Shields/Sandoval swap has been mentioned a few times and is likely bound to be brought up again from time to time over the next few months. I’m sure some Sox fans wish that he’d come to Fenway and the lack of any substantial rumors regarding him last offseason is at least mildly puzzling given the contract he eventually settled for. I wouldn’t expect to see a trade for him.

For starters, it’d take more than Sandoval to make a trade even, which is problematic. Shields’ Fenway numbers are likely why the Sox avoided him last offseason and trading Panda along with one or two decent prospects and maybe some salary relief isn’t going to bring them a surefire ace. Shields is having a good year, but advanced metrics are less than kind and his deal is also pretty back loaded. Unless the Sox can get him for Sandoval/magic beans, it doesn’t seem to be a very good idea.

Cashing in on prospects might be Dombrowski’s best move. Prospects are after all, prospects. The Sox were wise to hold on to Betts and Swihart in their failed pursuit of Cole Hamels, but that doesn’t mean that they don’t have plenty of highly ranked minor leaguers who likely won’t become every day major leaguers.

The Sox have $68 million in horribly spent money (Ramirez, Sandoval, Porcello, and Craig) headed into 2016. We could say that no team would go out and sign both Price and Grienke, but that’s pretty much the same amount that the Sox spent on three albatross and quite frankly silly contracts this offseason. Yes, hindsight is 20/20 A sane GM would’ve only signed one of Ramirez/Sandoval and wouldn’t have signed Porcello to that ridiculous extension. Craig is a whole different blunder and he’s just simply depressing. You could say hindsight is 20/20, but it really wasn’t in this case. The Craig trade, signing both Panda/Hanley, and the Porcello extension were all panned at the time. This was all avoidable.

Bottom line is that the Sox have lots of money tied up in lots of crappy players. Dombrowski will need to be smart with his resources to avoid adding more disastrous deals. Seeing as he’s the guy who signed the horrible Justin Verlander extension and the inevitably disastrous one for Miguel Cabrera, I’m not too confident.

I’d like to say I’d wish Henry would open the purse strings a bit more and let the Sox blow past the luxury tax, even if it’s only for a year, but the FA market looks pretty dicey. Price/Grienke will command ridiculously high salaries and Cueto has looked awful since arriving in Kansas City. Zimmerman could be a fit, but he’ll have plenty of teams vying for his services.

Then there’s the mid tier market, which has plenty of options. After the Red Sox tried to compile a rotation filled with #2-3 type starters, I’m not sure how much DD is going to want to spend on guys like Mike Leake or Brett Anderson, but one thing’s for sure. This offseason will be a hell of a lot different than last year’s.

Sunday

13

September 2015

5

COMMENTS

I Hate Mr. Bates

Written by , Posted in Blog, Downton Abbey, Pop Culture

I recently rewatched most of Downton Abbey in preparation for season six, which starts a week from today. Being known for its soap operatic value, one shouldn’t step into Highclere Castle expecting plots that make sense or robust character development. Julian Fellowes doesn’t hit his mark every time, but there’s certainly a reason why the recent trailer tugs at many people’s heartstrings and it’s not just because of the music. It’s because we’ve grown to love these characters.

There’s one man I used to love (as one loves a fictional character) once upon a time, but that affection has vanished. Like many, I started to feel it in season four and that continued as questions regarding his morality surfaced yet again. As you probably gathered from the title of this article, I am, of course, referring to Mr. Bates.

At first glance, he’s a tough guy to hate. Misery seems to follow him everywhere, tracking him by the sound of his cane thumping on Downton’s creaky floors and yet, he’s a pretty decent guy. He gave Molesley some money and saved Barrow from ruin at the hands of O’Brien/Jimmy. So why hate his Lordship’s valet?

The Mr. Green plotline has been almost universally panned. Many articles have been penned about how Fellowes has no idea as to what to do with either Bates. I’ve found that the problem goes even beyond Mr. Green. To put it simply, Mr. Bates is terrible.

I’ve gotten into several arguments regarding the Bates/Barrow feud. People say I’m horrible or contrarian for taking Thomas’ side, usually because they forget what’s important. It’s not about who’s the most morally altruistic person. It’s about who’s fun to watch.

There’s a scene in season five where Barrow acknowledges the simple fact that the two do not like each other. This gave me a bit of an “aha” moment as I realized that I don’t like Mr. Bates either. In season three, I was firmly on team #freeBates. Now when I watch season three, I usually skip his scenes (along with Edith’s, which makes it easier for me to keep watching the same show over and over).

Think about how many episodes of the show feature a happy Mr. Bates. He’s sad when he first gets there because no one likes him. He spends the rest of season one feuding with the O’Brien/Barrow dream team and sad about his leg. We also find out he was in trouble for being a thief, which was the first red flag.

Season two brings even more bad news. We find out he has a wife who he doesn’t like. He has a brief moment of happiness when he marries Anna, but then he goes to jail, where he spends most of season three.

He’s happy for a little bit at the end of season three and the beginning of season four, though we find out that he’s also a forger in addition to being a thief. What a standup guy! He’s also always moody. Sure, he’s had rotten luck, but so has Molesley. Downton’s cricket champion never lets the world get him down.

The reason for this sadness is simple. He has nothing else to do. Fellowes never tried to give him any storyline that didn’t involve horrible things happening to him. It got boring. I left the #freeBates team in favor of #killBates. At least then, Molesley could take his place as valet.

Downton Abbey is a drama. We expect characters to endure hardships. It’s generally considered reasonable to expect to be given a reason to like the character as well.

Bates and Barrow contrast well in this regard. Both are generally pretty moody and we know why. Bates is a crippled creep and Barrow is gay at a time when that was not only completely unacceptable, it was criminal.

Their unpleasantness manifests itself in different ways. Barrow takes his anger out on others while Bates is just a grump. We can probably assume that Bates is the better person (unless he actually killed Mr. Green or more gruesome details about his past turn up), but what does that really matter?

As a character, Bates lacks depth. Even his romance with Anna seemed a bit rushed. More importantly, he doesn’t make for good television.

Reports for season six suggest that not everyone will have a happy ending. It’s hard to tell where Bates will fit into this. One would think Fellowes would throw a curveball and let him limp off into the sunset with Anna on his arm. Problem is, I don’t care.

Friday

28

August 2015

1

COMMENTS

Game of Clickbait: A Song of “Journalists” and Thieves

Written by , Posted in Blog, Game of Thrones, Pop Culture

I saw something unfortunate on Twitter this morning as I looked through my friends’ tweets. The Huffington Post’s Bill Bradley put out an article on Wednesday claiming to have a “new” Game of Thrones theory regarding the parentage of Jon Snow and Meera Reed. Given that A Clash of Kings, the first book to feature Meera, was released in 1998 and that this series can be called a worldwide phenomenon since at least 2005, when A Feast For Crows hit #1 on the New York Times bestseller list (a rare feat for a fantasy novel), it is more than safe to say that this theory is anything but new.

If you google “Jon Meera twins,” tons of posts come up that are earlier than Wednesday. Without even clicking on a single link, I see one from asoiaf.westeros.org from 2012. I doubt that’s the oldest either.

It’s embarrassing that HuffPo calls this journalism. The site has been praised by many for ushering in the modern day era of the news. While there’s plenty of truth to that, things like this thievery aren’t just a disgrace, they’re sad.

It’s sad because there are countless ASOIAF/GOT fans who have put in thousands of hours of research and discussion who then go uncredited by major news websites. This goes even beyond that. You have a guy who pretends they don’t even exist and that he’s the first to make this groundbreaking revelation.

We know why. Game of Thrones has over a hundred million fans. Articles like these are cash cows, especially when the research only takes a three-word Google search. It’s free money.

Dishonest money. I’m lucky to consider many of the top ASOIAF commentators to be friends. I’ve featured many of them here in my “Interviews of Ice and Fire” feature. I haven’t featured Bill Bradley and don’t plan to. I wouldn’t want to go through the trouble of finding someone to answer his questions for him.

The people who work hard to produce new content whether it’s articles, podcasts, or even just posts on the subrebbit or other the forums play a crucial role in Game of Thrones’ worldwide popularity. They’re the reason why genuinely new theories are still being discovered years after the last book in the main series was released. Without them, Huffington Post and Buzzfeed would have no one to steal from.

Here’s the thing that really bugs me and the reason I decided to write this. The top commentators in the ASOIAF/GOT fandom are good people. Beyond that, they’re not difficult to get ahold of. If they answer my tweets and e-mails, I imagine they’d respond to requests for paid freelance work.

I imagine this article will be discovered by a crony of one of the clickbait websites at some point in time. If you feel ashamed reading this, good. You should be ashamed. There used to be a code that journalists abided by. Just because you’re behind a computer writing for an online publication rather than a print newspaper doesn’t mean there shouldn’t be integrity in your work.

For you, the reader, check out the work of this expansive fandom. It’s good stuff and you won’t have to wait years for mainstream media to find it.

Tuesday

25

August 2015

1

COMMENTS

Interviews of Ice and Fire: Ashaya of History of Westeros Podcast

Written by , Posted in Blog, Game of Thrones, IOIAF, Pop Culture

It is a pleasure to welcome Ashaya of History of Westeros Podcast to the site. History of Westeros is one of the most in depth ASOIAF resources available; creating episodes that piece together the series’ confusing timeline along with commentary on the houses, theories, reviews of Game of Thrones, and just about anything else imaginable. HoW recently wrapped up an in-depth series on Summerhall. You can support HoW through their Patreon campaign.

HoW just wrapped up two podcasts on the Tragedy of Summerhall, one of the series’ strangest mysteries and certainly one that’s overlooked by casual fans. Given how little information there is on the topic, can you tell us a little bit about how you approached it? In terms of difficulty, how did it compare to some of your other series?

 The episodes in our Religion & Magic series are generally the hardest to put together, specifically the episodes on weirwoods. The possibilities of magic are just so wide open, and that tends to make it harder to decide how to frame the narrative of the episode, and how to organize and present everything. The Tragedy of Summerhall episodes weren’t part of that series, but they obviously deal with magic as well, and so they did have some extra difficulty. We speculated about the magical aspect of it a bit, but more so focused on the role of prophecy and on the impact Summerhall had on characters like Aerys, Rhaella, and Rhaegar (and the realm).

 One thing that’s stuck with me since listening is the potential involvement of the pyromancers and how Jaime had a particular hatred of them. Given that they had seemingly no friends in court during Robert’s reign and plenty of people who don’t seem like they would be particularly fond of their line of work (Robert, Jon Arryn, Stannis), why do you think they were kept around at all?

I don’t think Robert or Jon Arryn would have felt any particular motivation to outright end the Alchemists’ Guild, which is a rather drastic course of action. If we’d had Jaime in a position of power, he likely would have, though! That said, their power has waned and waxed over time, so they weren’t as prominent during Robert’s time as they are currently in the series or (obviously) during Aerys’ reign.

One thing you mentioned that I’ve never even thought about was Aerys II’s lack of known bastards. Do you think that is an oversight on GRRM’s part or could something larger be at play?

 Questions like these are difficult because well, I do often find myself debating whether something can be explained sufficiently in-universe or whether the Doylist method is more appropriate. I know that there are a lot of fans who are pretty firmly Watsonian, but I enjoy both types of explanation, though I favor the Watsonian view overall. So often obscure things in A Song of Ice and Fire make perfect sense, and you don’t have to look at things from an out-of-universe perspective. My answer, then, is that while I think it’s possible that it was an oversight, I think there are a number of in-universe explanations, namely a) Aerys had issues with fertility (my pick) or b) Varys dealt with his bastards.

One more Summerhall question as you mentioned Shiera Seastar and she’s one of my favorite tertiary characters. I’ve often viewed her as a parallel character to Bloodraven. As unanswerable as this is, does her being Quaithe preclude her from being somehow involved in Summerhall?

No, though I personally don’t subscribe to that theory myself.

My favorite HoW episodes are the ones you did on the Battle of Ice. Granted, the two are completely different but have any of your thoughts changed since season 5?

The landscape (hah get it) of the show is indeed entirely different from the books; for instance, we theorized about the ice lakes (now you get it) having a role in the battle, with Stannis laying a trap for the Freys (we also theorized that it might backfire and get the Manderlys, but let’s ignore that). I would say that it had an effect on me, but I strongly feel that if Stannis is going to be the one to burn Shireen in the books, it will be for something far direr, and so I still don’t think that the Battle of Ice is the end for Stannis in the books. In the podcast, I said I thought that Stannis would win, and I still feel that way (with a touch more doubt, admittedly).

Since Euron = Daario seems to be unanswerable, I shall ask, how do you feel about that theory in general? Do you think there are too many identity theories floating around?

There are definitely too many identity theories! Why, I’ve even seen theories that Amin of A Podcast of Ice and Fire is my very own Aziz of History of Westeros. I try to be diplomatic about most theories, but I can’t do it for theories about Euron being Daario, Rhaegar being Mance, Arthur being Mance, etc.

If you could pick the topic for the next The Princess and the Queen or The Rogue Prince style novella, what would you pick?

Fun question! My answer for this is different than what it would be if it were for a more traditional style rather than the masterly historical style of those novellas. I would love to read an account of the Rhoynar migration and find out more specifics about the people Nymeria traveled with and so on…that might be a bit large for a novella, though, even in the history style. Alternatively, the Conquest of Dorne.

What is the craziest theory you think might actually be true.

I’m not a big theorist, especially not crazy theories, but I’m fond of the Citadel Conspiracy theory, Jojenpaste, and, (our own idea), the theory (more of a hypothesis really) that weirwoods have some sort of connection to genetics, with family looks sticking for thousands of years due to their influence. In the case of the Citadel theory, I don’t think there’s a mass conspiracy, but I think their bias is clear and should always be considered in analysis. In the case of Jojenpaste, I just like it and think it’s (deliciously) dark. The third is pretty crazy for us, but given the length of time that the appearances of these families have remained in stasis, and that we know magic is involved in the genetics, I still find myself liking the idea.

I know HoW has been to many fan conventions over the years. Can you think of a highlight that you’d like to share?

Not as many as I’d like! Though we have plans to go to Mysticon and Balticon next year, so soon there will be more under our belt. It was a huge honor to meet George, talk to him, give him our card, etc., but I think hearing him read the History of the Westerlands from The World of Ice and Fire was the highlight for me. This was prior to the release of the book, and so we were particularly hoping for material from TWOIAF. When we met GRRM the day before and told him that our podcast was titled ‘History of Westeros’, he told us that we should be excited for the reading the next day, then, so we knew in advance that we would for sure be getting new material. Let me just say…it was so hard to sleep! But then at least it was very easy to get up early due to my excitement. We frantically took notes at the reading, and were able to publish it on our website, which brought us some good publicity, which was a nice bonus. But! The day got even better, because during the Q&A after the reading, GRRM picked me to ask him a question….I was able to ask a long-burning question (what is the Unnamed Princess of Dorne’s name?), which was a dream, even if he didn’t have an answer (boo). One day I’ll have a name for her!

What shocked you the most about season 5?

That Tyene used the phrase “bad pussy”, which is, by the way, a non-canon piece of slang that has never been used in A Song of Ice and Fire, save for once in the term “pussy willows” in The Mystery Knight.

How many times a day do you get asked if Jon Snow is still alive?

Me, personally? Hardly ever. How many times a day do I have to read other people speculating based on things like his hair? Often. As an aside – it’s always the wrong question, anyway, he’s obviously dead, the question is whether Jon Snow will be brought back to life.

Will HoW do book to show episodes next season?

Definitely! They were a lot of fun, and it was great to have more opportunities to have guests like Radio Westeros on. I myself will likely be in the first few and then drop out for the rest of the season, as I did this past season. I like talking about the characters when they are first introduced, and speculating on where the season will take us, but, at least last season, I quickly got burnt out and frustrated. We’ll see, though, for all I know, I’m going to love every episode of next season! (I crack myself up)

Generic question, but who is your favorite character? Is the same true for the show?

I’ve actually done this great ASOIAF character sorter, which takes hours and hours, and I found that my number one is Sansa Stark for both A Song of Ice and Fire and Game of Thrones (the GoT sorter…yes I did both). It’s difficult to compare POV characters with minor characters, but some of my other favorites are Arianne Martell, Samwell Tarly, Maester Aemon, Varys, Wylla Manderly, Alys Karstark, and of course the usual suspects like Arya, Tyrion, and Jaime. I need a historical character sorter still, but I am particularly fond of Rohanne Webber, Egg/Aegon V, Nymeria of Ny Sar, and of course our patron saint, Septon Barth.

What’s next for HoW?

We are continuing our series on the Blackfyre Rebellions as well as preparing episodes on a few different houses like House Dayne and House Royce, and preparing an episode on Nymeria of the Rhoynar. We will also have live Q&A episodes more often as we are close to hitting that milestone on Patreon.

Saturday

22

August 2015

0

COMMENTS

Aqua Teen Hunger Force Is Difficult To Eulogize When It Doesn’t Feel Like The End

Written by , Posted in Blog, Pop Culture

Aqua Teen Hunger Force is supposed to end tomorrow. I should say, Aqua Teen Hunger Force is ending tomorrow since it is actually ending, but I can’t really bring myself to accept it. This is after all, a show that’s changed its own name four times.

I shouldn’t say ending. It’s being cancelled, which is baffling. It even feels weird to type that blasphemy.

Maybe it’s because it’s the last Adult Swim original to call it day, with a run that was longer than the other three combined (Sealab 2021, The Brak Show, and Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law). ATHF is practically synonymous with the network itself, which ushered in a new era of animated excellence and for better or for worse, gave us more Family Guy (and Futurama, though that was mostly a good thing).

It could be because popular, long running animated comedies don’t really end. The Simpsons, Family Guy, and South Park are older and still going strong in certain ways. The ones that did end, King of the Hill and Futurama, were cancelled. While it would be silly to suggest that ATHF ever reached the worldwide popularity of the first three mentioned, it is the flagship program of its own network, which certainly should mean that cancellation shouldn’t be an issue.

Its fifth and final title, Aqua Teen Hunger Force Forever might seem ironic since it’s the last one, but it is rather appropriate. With co-creator Dave Willis remaining at Adult Swim, it seems plausible that the show could, and probably will, resurface at a later date, considering Adult Swim’s antics (Perfect Hair Forever anyone?) and the current trend in TV to bring old stuff back, which I doubt is going away anytime soon.

Patti Smith has recorded a somber elegy for ATHF. I’m not sure what else should be said since I refuse to believe this is actually the end. Call it denial, but it’s more than that.

We know at some point in time, Master Shake, Frylock, Meatwad, and Carl will show up. Whether it’s another season, movie, or an April Fool’s Day gag, we haven’t seen the last of anyone’s favorite cartoon “detectives.” I’m not even fully convinced we won’t see them next year with another season.

I could point out that TV hasn’t always been kind to the surreal and the unconventional. Shows that dare to be different often get cancelled, though normally not after fifteen years. That’s what I can’t seem to wrap my head around.

ATHF has never been an easy one to assess from a critical standpoint, making it hard to say whether or not it’s gone downhill in recent years. Adult Swim President Mike Lazzo said he was ready to move on. Was that for good reason?

I’m going to go ahead and say no. Recent years have probably had more hit or miss episodes and the same is true for nearly every long running series. Aqua TV Show Show’s ninth episode “Piranha Germs” remains one of my favorite of the whole series. With humor like that and a will to continue, I think it’s safe to say ATHF had plenty left in the tank.

So it ends. For now, or maybe not. Perhaps I’m wrong and we’ll never see those guys again. I hope not.

I’ll end this “eulogy” with this, Aqua Teen Hunger Force is one of the greatest animated comedies of all time. I suppose some will disagree and I hope Master Shake throws those people on the ground before going back to his reclining chair. Why didn’t he have a bedroom?

Monday

17

August 2015

0

COMMENTS

Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp Succeeds Where Arrested Development Failed

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As someone who enjoyed Wet Hot American Summer, but not to the same degree as much of its cult fanbase, I was skeptical of how the Netflix prequel series was going to turn out. It’s highly doubtful that this would’ve been made had cast members like Amy Poehler, Bradley Cooper, and Paul Rudd not become huge stars fourteen years down the road, but that also presents a problem. Huge stars typically don’t have much time for projects like these.

This was the problem with Arrested Development’s fourth season. Its cast was busy, so the show filmed around them which didn’t really work that well. It’s hard to recapture the magic when half the people who helped make it in the first pace are only in it for two seconds and rarely at the same time.

WHAS: FDOC had a couple things going for it right from the start. Creators David Wain and Michael Showalter were obviously locks for every episode, but the series benefitted from the fact that a good chunk of the cast hadn’t necessarily gone on to “bigger better things.” In actors like Michael Ian Black and Ken Marino’s case, they were pretty much doing the same sort of stuff of Comedy Central and Adult Swim.

Which isn’t to say that WHAS: FDOC solely relied on cast members that weren’t appearing in blockbuster films. Rudd, Poehler and Elizabeth Banks have ample amounts of screen time. Mad Men’s John Slattery was brought on to aid Poehler’s scenes in cases where Cooper wasn’t available and you don’t necessarily feel like anyone’s missing.

The series also added numerous big stars to its cast. In addition to Slattery, Jon Hamm, Jason Scharztman, Chris Pine, Kristen Wiig, Josh Charles, Jordan Peele, and Michael Cera aid the show tremendously, giving the viewer the idea that this isn’t merely a harebrained scheme that Wain and Showalter managed to trick Netflix into funding. WHAS isn’t strictly back for nostalgic value, it also has something new to bring to the table.

It’s hard to write this sentence about WHAS, but much of the humor in the series is actually pretty subtle. It’s filled with quotable moments, but the metahumor is what really sucked me in. Most of the cast looks phenomenal, but this is a prequel starring a cast that’s now a decade and a half older than when the first was made. Some of them do look pretty old, which definitely plays into the wackiness of the series as a whole. A lot has changed and yet much of it looks the same.

Is it accessible for people who weren’t fans of the original film? Probably not, but it earns points for not trying to be. The show managed to have a pretty A list cast for a Netflix mini-series based off a box office bomb. I think it’s doing just fine.

This could have been really terrible, which isn’t to say that it hits its mark 100% of the time. The show does fall flat a little bit in the middle episodes, but it’s never awful, unless you hated the show to begin with.

We’re going to see a lot of revivals in the coming months. Even Coach is coming back. Many of these will suck, like Arrested Development’s fourth season and for many, that will tarnish the legacy of the source material.

Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp chose not to rest on its laurels. It’s a worthy successor that enhances one’s enjoyment of the original in many ways. I never went to summer camp, but I hope most of them are exactly like Camp Firewood, talking cans of vegetables and all.

Wednesday

22

July 2015

0

COMMENTS

UnReal Is The Perfect Summer TV Show

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There are two types of shows that air in the summer. There’s summer TV and shows that happen to air in the summer. Six Feet Under is a summer TV show. True Detective is a show that airs in the summer. Rescue Me is a summer TV show. Masters of Sex is a show that airs in the summer. Burn Notice is a summer TV show. Rectify is a show that airs in the summer.

You might be confused with what the difference is, especially since none of these shows really have anything in common with each other. There’s really only one word that makes a TV show that airs in the summer, a summer TV show. Fun.

It’s hard to imagine summer TV being what it is now without Six Feet Under, which aired in the infant stages of cable television’s rise to power. Back in a day when channels like HBO protected their especially quirky shows by airing in them in the broadcast TV offseason, a show about a family that ran a funeral home could plant its dark comedic roots without being slaughtered by the likes of an ER or a CSI.

That’s less important nowadays when the overwhelming majority of shows that anyone cares to talk about air on cable anyway, but summer TV has always maintained a niche that at least in theory separates itself from the rest of the year. I doubt it’s a coincidence that Netflix drops all the Orange is the New Black episodes in the summer months, when everyone craves something a little lighter than say, House of Cards.

Which isn’t to say that dramedies don’t air at all times of the year. Only that they flourish in the months when the days are long and people tune in at night to see something with a little more flair than a conventional drama, perhaps with a margarita or a Corona. This year’s line-up is packed with shows, but not necessarily many that fit the label I’ve described besides OINTB, which caters to the binge watchers.

I don’t think it should be too surprising to see Lifetime produce a hit scripted drama. After all, History managed it with Vikings. Fifteen years ago, the notion that AMC was capable of producing one of the most successful shows of all time was laughable. Turns out, the channel didn’t even need to stray very far for its core philosophy either.

UnReal is about the behind the scenes madness of a Bachelor stand in show called Everlasting. As you can probably imagine, the show is heavy on the melodrama. What was really shocking is how well that worked.

UnReal’s best asset is its cast. Shiri Appleby does a marvelous job playing the enigmatic lead Rachel, whose shadiness goes well beyond the point of absurdity. I can think of about a hundred ways in which her character could ruin the whole show, but Appleby keeps her grounded enough to make it all work.

House of Cards alum Constance Zimmer is also superb, though it takes a minute to fully comprehend how an actress so misused on a Netflix show could then be properly utilized on a Lifetime scripted drama. Craig Bierko, who played one of my least favorite characters on Boston Legal (one of my all time favorite shows), also plays his part to perfection.

What makes UnReal so satisfying? The show isn’t afraid to be what it is, a scripted drama about a reality show that’s lauded as a joke that airs on a network that also happens to be lauded as a joke. One might say UnReal itself was in on the joke.

It’s a show that’s self aware of the medium it exists in. It knows it can get away with wildly outlandish plots and dreamy sequences played to the tune of a Lifetime TV movie. UnReal isn’t trying to be anything else, which is perhaps why it succeeds. It’s a genuinely original idea in a world that’s starving for ideas to the point where it brought back Coach and Prison Break.

The true appeal lies with UnReal’s delivery. It could survive on being “so bad it’s good,” like the recent A Deadly Adoption Lifetime TV movie starring Will Ferrell and Kristen Wiig. Instead, it uses its quality cast and lets them run wild in the absurdist playground.

Which is what makes a perfect summer TV show. Six Feet Under’s black humor would’ve worked at any point in the year, but it felt especially delectable when the weather melts away your other worries. The fact that it airs on a Monday might matter during the fall months, but here it carries the “c’est la vie” mentality that makes it all the more refreshing. An excuse to have a glass of wine at 10 pm on a Monday and a good one at that!

Sunday

28

June 2015

1

COMMENTS

Interviews of Ice and Fire: Hamish Duncan aka Militant Penguin

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Season five might be over, but I’m excited to keep the Interviews of Ice and Fire going with our next guest. Hamish Duncan, known throughout the ASOIAF community as Militant Penguin is a contributor to Wars and Politics of Ice and Fire. He is also one of the moderators for the ASOIAF subreddit.

One of your essay series covers the “would be” kings of Westeros. Given that none of them have POV chapters to call their own and we can only see them through the perspectives of other characters. Obviously this leads to some discrepancies depending on how the individual character felt about each king. Which do you think got the fairest shake from the characters in the series?

I’d say that Stannis probably gets the fairest shake of all of the kings. Robb is definitely a close second though. Stannis is viewed from multiple POVs all of whom have their own agendas and biases. However, I think that the greater number of POVs representing their own views about Stannis actually benefits his overall character and gives him a more realized form. Eventually all of these biases and views start overlapping and you see the more realized form of a character. It’s sort of a blend of a mosaic and a Venn diagram in a way.

Davos Seaworth, Eddard Stark, Maester Cressen, Melisandre of Asshai, Asha Greyjoy, and Jon Snow give us a more reasoned, positive, and deeper perspective into Stannis. They see beyond the hard, stubborn, teeth grinding king and battle commander. They see the man for what he is, a deeply conflicted, imperfect, and flawed man who is ultimately good in his own niche way.

Cersei Lannister, Tyrion Lannister, and Catelyn Stark have their own views on Stannis that are somewhat negative but do give a great insight into how hard it is to like Stannis when you deal with him on a shallower, administrative basis. Stannis is a stickler for the rules and the law, with some bending one way or another, and people like that are not really fun to be around and are quite unpopular. They get the job done but they are not well liked for it.

Theon Greyjoy and Samwell Tarly are scared of Stannis, although Theon is more afraid of Ramsay, because Stannis is absolutely terrifying. However, they give ample insight into what it means to know such an imposing man and be at the mercy of his mood.

Stannis gets the fairest shake of any king in the series because we hear far more peoples’ thoughts on him than any other king. The positive, the negative, the fearful, the shallow, and the deep all give a far more complete picture of Stannis Baratheon both as a king and as a man.

If you could give one of the kings a POV chapter, which would you pick?

Definitely Robb Stark. I would have loved to have seen the Westerlands campaign from his point of view. However, I think that Robb as a POV character would have been a great read. He strikes me as one of the more tragic and tormented characters of the series. He’s left in charge on his own at a very young age while a lot of the family he grew up with leave Winterfell, he rides to war to save his father who is ultimately killed, he is effectively blackmailed into a marriage pact with a woman he may never love, he has to earn the respect and win the loyalty of battle hardened veteran soldiers under his command, he must win victory after victory or risk annihilation, he is elected king at a very young age, he has to defend the indefensible Riverlands while the Greyjoys attack his home, his best friend betrays him and apparently burns down his home and kills his brothers, he is wounded and accidentally sleeps with a kind girl who nurses him in his darkest hour, he betrays a marriage pact to save her honour at the expense of his own because he’d never want his own possible child to suffer like Jon Snow did, his uncle apparently unknowingly botches his entire campaign plan that ultimately results in the him being effectively surrounded, he is abandoned by the Freys and Karstarks because he did what he thought was right if not smart, in his desperation he turns to the man whose marriage pact he betrayed for help while one of his top generals actively sabotages the war effort and plots behind his back, he finally figures out how to get back home before a wedding where his friends and allies are butchered before his eyes before he himself is murdered after possibly dying inside of his own direwolf beforehand.

Imagine reading all of that from Robb’s perspective. If you thought Catelyn’s chapters could be depressing imagine reading Robb’s right up until his death.

One of your other essays goes in-depth into The Great Council, which has an impact on the series that most people don’t really realize which of course directly lead to the Dance of the Dragons. How different do you think the series would be if Rhaenyra had ascended to the thrones?

I think the end result may have been the same on the condition that a civil war still occurred. The people would have turned against her, providing the war lasted the same amount of time and did the same amount of damage, and she would have likely died, probably being murdered by one person or another. I think Aegon III probably still would have ascended to the throne but would have had a lot of difficulty in ruling a land ravaged by dragons.

If the war never happened and succession went ahead like Viserys I planned with Rhaenyra ascending to the Iron Throne without issue there may have been a decent chance for peace. However, given her later paranoia, violence, and the past moves of Alicent Hightower, it probably would have come to war in one way or another if Rhaenyra made a move against the Hightowers and Aegon if she felt they were a big enough threat to her continued reign. 

The thing that bugged me about season five more than anything else was Jorah contracting greyscale. In reading your Rhaegar essay over, I see a fair amount of book parallels between Ser Friendzone and Jon Connington. 

Jorah and Connington are definitely birds of a feather when it comes to their histories and personalities. Both were exiled from their homelands, lost their honour in some way or another by being sellswords and either by slaving or by allegedly dying as a thieving drunk, and both are doomed to love Targaryens even if it ruins and kills them.

They are similarly tragic characters who are ultimately the architects of their own destruction and they’ll do it all for someone unattainable that they obsessively love.

Jorah wants to get back in Daenerys’ good graces after betraying her and being exiled. It’s about guilt for Connington who blames himself for Rhaegar’s death and is willing to do anything to make up for it. Guilt is one of their commonalities; Jorah’s actual guilt for being a spy and Connington’s imagined guilt over Rhaegar’s death. Love and guilt are ultimately going to destroy these men and they are too wrapped up in it to the extent that they haven’t quite realized the mortal danger they have put themselves and/or others in.

I really enjoyed your essay on Domeric Bolton. Is it safe to say you’re not a believer in the “Bolt-On” theory that Roose plans to pull a Buffalo Bill and wear Ramsey’s skin?

Thanks very much. I really enjoyed writing that essay. It was great fun trying to play detective. I’m not a believer in “Bolt-On” but I love that theory. It is a hell of a lot of fun to read. I think there was a YouTube video last year that laid out “Bolt-On” in all of its skinless glory and it somehow made not seem as farfetched as you’d initially think after reading it for the first time.

I will always encourage and support fans who do that amount of out of the box thinking. A Song of Ice and Fire is a great universe to play around when you make your theories.

You’re a moderator for the ASOIAF subreddit. Since this time last year, we’ve seen the releases of “The Rogue Prince,” The World of Ice and Fire, season five of Game of Thrones, and another TWOW sample chapter while of course the one thing everyone really wants is still sitting on GRRM’s Wordstar, Have you noticed a heightened sense of urgency within the fandom as the show is only a few months away from blowing past the books?

I would definitely agree that there is a heightened sense of urgency within the fandom and I am absolutely a part of that as well. When you’ve been waiting for a series of books to finish for a number of years and its show adaptation is blowing straight past it to completion while hitting almost every single high note that you’ve been waiting years to read about, it can absolutely affect your sense of urgency.

Not to sound like a purist but the book fans love the intricacies of the story and how it all builds up to each individual climax. I’d say that we love the journey as much if not more than the climax but when a ten episode season often blows over the journey and straight to the climax it feels underwhelming and unfair. We walked the journey, analyzed the text, and theorized about the probable outcome. The show, often by necessity, can skip the large part of the fun journey and build up, and just do the highlights.

I’d say the urgency in the fandom comes from a lack of journey in the show, due to basic budget and production requirements, and the seemingly unearned and spoiler heavy climaxes. We want to see what happens with Jaime and Brienne in the Riverlands when they meet Lady Stoneheart. We want to watch the Battles of Fire, Ice, and Winterfell and see how it compares to our beliefs. Will Jon Snow be reborn in the lordly light of R’hollor? Will Daenerys conquer the Dothraki? Will Euron hit Oldtown and how will the Redwyne Fleet fair against the might of the Greyjoys? How will Littlefinger fall? Will Arya get her revenge? Will hype be acquired? And most importantly, will the North Remember?

It’s about the how, when, where, why, and what. Like the Faith of the Seven would argue, it’s not just about one aspect, it’s about how they fit together to make the greater organic whole.

I want to read about the events as they were originally built up and meant to be told before the show spoils the outcome of these events for me.

I recently wrote an article calling Kit Harrington’s interview with Entertainment Weekly a red herring. Have we seen the last of Jon Snow?

I’m thinking he’ll be back but in what sense is beyond me and that is something I am dying to read and watch. How will he return? Will we have a Beric Dondarrion/Lady Stoneheart situation? Will Jon live out his days in Ghost while his body is wighted? Or, and this is taken from an awesome, if grim theory I read a while back, will it even be Jon inside his body or will a much greyer character possess Jon’s body for his own purposes while Jon is left stranded inside of Ghost and trying to maintain his humanity before it fades away – the apparent fate of wargs when they make their final journey into their animal companions?

Jon will be back but he might not be the Jon we know.

Casting speculations have lead many to believe that we’ll see a Tower of Joy prequel scene next season. If you could film one event from before the main series, which would you pick?

Probably the Dance Over Harrenhal, an aerial dragon duel between Aemond ‘One-Eye’ Targaryen and Daemon Targaryen.

What were your thoughts on season five as a whole?

Season 5 had a lot of good going for it that prevented it from sucking outright. It was just meh to me. I wasn’t at all emotionally engaged. It was an entire season of “oh, well that happened”, imperfect writing, and not well thought out changes. I think it could have been really great if things were just executed better.

Season 5 was about a 7/10 for me. It was okay when it could have been brilliant.

In further detail though and to encapsulate it in one phrase, lack of immersion.

Unlike the previous seasons I just wasn’t encapsulates by the show. I just didn’t care overall apart from when it came to the Stannis changes but that’s an external and not an internal thing. To me there was just no tension or emotion in this season. It just felt hollow and there was no reason to give a damn or emotionally invest in characters anymore.

With previous seasons you were drawn into the show and felt less like a passive viewer and more of an in universe observer, as pretentious as that sounds. Stuff like the music and the effects drew you in and made you feel; hate, joy, love, fear, and even morbid laughter at times.

I wasn’t at all emotionally engaged with this season.

Episode 9 is a good example to highlight the issue I had.

The previous penultimate episodes definitely made me feel something before.

Baelor – Sadness for Ned, hatred for the Lannisters, and sadness and pride for Robb and Catelyn.

Blackwater – Hatred for Joffrey, morbid laughter with Cersei, pity for Sansa and Lancel, pride for Tyrion, Podrick, and Bronn, and awesomeness for Stannis.

The Rains of Castamere – Dread for Robb, Catelyn, Talisa, and the Northerners, morbid laughter with Walder Frey and the Blackfish, fear from Roose Bolton, happiness and sadness for Robb and Talisa, pride for Robb, happiness for Edmure, hatred for the Boltons and Freys, sadness for Grey Wind, and horror. It’s my favourite episode and I fucking love and hate it all at the same time.

The Watchers On The Wall – pride for Jon, Grenn, Sam, and Thorne, sadness for Grenn and Pyp, sadness for Jon seeing Ygritte die, morbid laughter at Hob, the Giant archer, and Janos Slynt.

Dance of the Dragons – meh.

What worked and what didn’t for you?

What Didn’t Work

– Dorne was not great save for Siddig, Flynn, and Coster-Waldau. Things like the dialogue, choreography, editing, and writing just didn’t work.

– Loras is a problem I’ve mentioned before. He’s a really bad gay stereotype, a pretty demeaning one at that, when he could be a really interesting character. Despite its wonderful and awesome gratuity at times, Spartacus knew how to write gay characters and they were awesome.

– Bad writing and characterisation. This affected a lot of people. Stannis, Olly, Sansa, Melisandre, Selyse, Sand Snakes, Elliara, Loras, Doran, etc. A lot of plot contrivances.

– At times, bad fighting choreography.

– Littlefinger’s ridiculous plan.

– Too many black and white characters. Not enough grey.

– New material often wasn’t that well thought out, written, and executed. I have no problem with new material but just as long as it is executed well.

What Did Work

– House of Black and White along with Arya.

– Acting was on point for a lot of the season, save for our serpent friends.

– Effects were great as always except for Dany on Drogo in episode 9.

– Hardhome was excellent. One of the best the series has ever done.

– Faith Militant and Sons of the Harpy were suitably imposing and intimidating.

– I liked Daznak’s pit and the gladiator showcase. A lot of good differing fighting styles were put on display for us to enjoy.

– Cersei’s walk was well executed.

– A lot of great chemistry between the cast members.

– Excellent music as always.

I often felt that this past season saw some unnatural character deviations, mainly from Littlefinger, Stannis, and Brienne. Am I being too hard on D&D?

I think it there are definitely some deviations in the show that are unnatural for characters. Littlefinger, as much as I hate him, is not stupid and wouldn’t risk Sansa’s life like that. She’s far too valuable to leave in that kind of unknown situation.

As for Brienne, I think this comes down to not having much for her to do this season. Some of her scenes were a little too obvious at times and a bit contrived but I think she remained as intact as she could, save for calling Renly the king – in no world was Renly not a usurper.

Properly characterizing Stannis has always been an issue for the show from his first appearance. Stannis is arguably one of the most morally grey characters in the series and that can be incredibly hard to capture in a limited amount of scenes that are just a few minutes long. Sometimes, and I’m hardly unbiased about this so take it with a pinch of salt, I think the showrunners intentionally made him a lot darker than he should have been. They just didn’t do a great job of adequately capturing a lot of Stannis’ inner and outer character conflict. They made him a sexually obsessive religious fanatic who proclaims his love for his Greyscale infected daughter one day and burns her alive the next and that is rushed characterization for anyone. There was no tension or build up. It would have been better if we got a truer sense of how truly desperate Stannis’ situation was. Also, giving him Melisandre’s lines from A Storm of Swords about the value of an innocent life against a kingdom, removing the fact that it was Stannis who, following Davos’ council, chose to go to the Wall to rescue the Night’s Watch, and having him burn people for being infidels as opposed to the outright traitors they were really sticks in my craw. Stuff like that is unnecessary and annoying.

Getting back to your original point, sorry for the rant by the way, I think we are all entitled to our criticisms and praise for a piece of work. When it comes to adaptations of a beloved series this gets slightly more intense because there is already a piece of original work to compare the adaption to, this original work is often almost sacred to a fan base and a lot of them don’t like changes being made to the source material, which I totally understand.

However, as much as I dislike a lot of the changes made by D&D, I accept that a lot of them are necessary for one reason or another. I think as long as you don’t make it personal, there is no reason why you shouldn’t critique a piece of work as much as you like for what that work is and how it is executed.

It’s an adaptation, and as much as I’m salty about various changes, it is its own beast now. Books are still awesome and the show is really good too, for the most part. In all honesty I really don’t have this kind of enlightened attitude during the show season. Come next season I’ll probably be caught bitching with the best of them. 

What’s the craziest theory that you actually believe could be true? 

Howland Reed could actually be the High Sparrow and I would be totally okay with that. It would definitely detract from the characterization of both the Faith Militant and Cersei in the books but I really wouldn’t mind that much. 

Generic question, but one that I always like to ask. Who’s your favorite character? Is the same true for the TV show?

Favorite book character has got to be my beloved Wyman Manderly. This doesn’t carry over to the show unless he is cast for next season so my favorite show character is Ser Bronn of the Blackwater.

I was excited to see Benjen in the “previously on” for the season five finale, though the wolf pup didn’t appear. I’ve always though there’s a bigger reason that he joined the Night’s Watch besides the fact that he wouldn’t inherit Winterfell. Why do you think he took the black?

Well, the Starks do have a history of sending younger sons to the Wall but given all that happened during Robert’s Rebellion and how many Stark lives were lost, I always thought there must be a greater reason why Benjen took the black. I’m thinking, in a fashion similar to Ned, Benjen carries around the guilt of knowing something, probably the truth that Lyanna willingly ran off with Rhaegar, and has essentially gone into self-imposed exile in order to assuage his guilt by serving a realm that he played a minor part in nearly destroying. He may have also taken the black in order to prevent him from benefitting in one way or another from the deaths of his father, brother, and sister if a succession issue should’ve arisen.