Ian Thomas Malone

christmas Archive

Tuesday

14

December 2021

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The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus

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Our journey into the Rankin/Bass cinematic universe continues with the 1985 special The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus their final production to use traditional stop-motion animation. Based on L. Frank Baum’s 1902 novel of the same name, the film is a pretty bizarre Santa origin story that often feels more like a riff on The Lord of the Rings than holiday entertainment. Despite it’s weirdly complex narrative and confusing characters, the special is a ton of fun to watch, even if it delivers a much weirder brand of festive cheer.

This is almost certainly our final holiday episode of the season. Be sure to check out all of our Christmas coverage from 2020 & 2021. From all of us at Estradiol Illusions, we wish you a very pleasant holiday season and thank you for spending a bit of it with us. 

Monday

13

December 2021

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A Miser Brothers‘ Christmas

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Our holiday coverage continues with A Mister Brothers’ Christmas, the 2008 follow-up to the 1974 gem The Year Without a Santa Claus. Featuring returning voices Mickey Rooney and George S. Irving as Santa Claus and Heat Miser, the film aims to recapture the magic of the Rankin/Bass stop-motion classics. Unfortunately, the film never quite comes together as anything more than a nostalgia production with some truly horrendous music. Ian does her best to unpack what went wrong and why she’s still happy that it exists.

Friday

10

December 2021

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Pinocchio‘s Christmas

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Into the weeds of the Rankin/Bass holiday catalog! Pinocchio’s Christmas is a bizarre special, serving as both an adaption of the 1883 novel and a more traditional Santa-infused holiday narrative. There is a lot going on, with multiple villains and plotlines converging on the poor wooden boy. Ian does her best to unpack it all.

 

Be sure to check out all of our holiday-themed episodes!

Friday

10

December 2021

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The Little Drummer Boy

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We are continuing our Bass/Rankin coverage with the 1968 classic The Little Drummer Boy. Aaron starts off our story as a misanthropic troubadour performing for an audience of none, only to be changed by the healing power of laughter after pounding his drum until a newborn baby saved his lamb. Ian isn’t sure what to make of her affection for Ben Haramad, the closest thing the special has to a villain who isn’t driving a chariot in the middle of the night.

 

Be sure to check out all of our holiday-themed episodes!

Thursday

9

December 2021

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Rudolph‘s Shiny New Year

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Holiday coverage continues! Join Ian as she unpacks the trainwreck known as Rudolph’s Shiny New Year, where everyone’s favorite bullied reindeer is tasked with saving time itself. From the Archipelago of Last Years to Eon the Terrible, nothing here makes any sense. The people in power continue to pick on young children, presenting the sensible question of whether time should be saved.

Be sure to check out our episode from last year covering the original Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer special: https://ianthomasmalone.podbean.com/e/rudolph-a-transgender-perspective/

Tuesday

10

December 2019

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Christmas Under the Stars Wastes Its Runtime on Bizarre Subplots

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Part of the beauty of Hallmark Christmas movies is their ability to commit to truly absurd premises. The idea of a man recently laid off from his job in high finance being rescued from his aimless midday wandering to work in a Christmas tree lot seems rather preposterous, but Christmas Under the Stars turns that concept into an entire film. As a narrative it almost works.

Nick (Jesse Metcalfe) has a dream life, on the verge of making junior partner at his investment banking firm. That is, until he’s used as the scapegoat for an error made with their biggest client. Fired just before Christmas, Nick avoids his successful father and mopes around. Thankfully, Clem (Clarke Peters) is able to quickly, almost miraculously, identify the root of Nick’s sadness and offers him a job helping out at the Christmas tree lot that he’s run for the past thirty years.

Julie (Autumn Reeser) is a passionate middle school science teacher, saddened by the loss of her father, who naturally loved Christmas more than anything. When Julie isn’t looking out for tardy honors students, she’s taking care of her son Matt (Anthony Bolognese). Her lifelong friendship with Clem, who knew her grandfather from the air force, puts her in Nick’s orbit, allowing two downtrodden souls the chance to warm each other up for the holidays.

The film deserves credit for not putting romance at the heart of the narrative. Nick and Julie don’t spend all that much time courting each other, a breath of fresh air for a genre that often works on unrealistic time tables. Trouble is, Christmas Under the Stars chooses some pretty bizarre plot points including parental medical debt and the future of a seasonal vacant lot to drive its narrative.

Clem’s love of Christmas is the fodder that fuels plenty of holiday films, but Christmas Under the Stars channels that passion in ways that are hard to relate to. A big evil real estate company wants to repurpose the lot, which presumably remains vacant for 11 months out of the year. It’s never explained what Clem does for work when he’s not selling Christmas trees. Plenty of people have fond memories of chopping down their own trees at farms, but this film asks us to invest emotional weight in the future of a concrete lot in the middle of a city.

Similarly casting capitalism as its nemesis, the film presents Julie as saddled with medical debt from her father’s death. This creates romantic problems when she learns that the firm who bought her debt obligations, currently pressing her for repayment, was once Nick’s top client. This whole dynamic is weirdly complex and totally unnecessary for a film with way too many subplots.

There are other minor quibbles with the script and production values that are somewhat to be expected. At one point, Julie states that her parents met at Clem’s lot, which makes a big deal out of its thirtieth anniversary. Trouble is, that would put Julie at about age 29, while raising an adoptive teenager. Similarly unrealistic is Julie’s immaculate full makeup, perfect in every scene, even when she’s taking her child to buy a Christmas tree.

Christmas Under the Stars has some charm. The acting is quite entertaining, with Peters, Reeser, and Metcalfe making the most of a mediocre script. The film would have been much better off centering itself on a few narratives rather than completely spread out over too many subplots. There’s a good story here about the power of the holidays to put life in perspective. Unfortunately it’s mostly buried under a load of convolution.

Wednesday

17

December 2014

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COMMENTS

Ranking The Office Christmas Episodes

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While Christmas episodes are common for many TV shows, there aren’t too many that have them as seasonal mainstays. Perhaps it’s especially appropriate considering the original UK series ended with a Christmas Special. Christmas at Dunder Mifflin represented a time for humor, plenty of feels, and an excuse to congregate under the mistletoe, while usually drunk off of vodka or beet wine.

This list ranks the seven Christmas episodes. Note seasons one and four did not have Christmas themed episodes, as one was only six episodes and four was during the Writer’s Strike. As with all of these sorts of lists, the rankings are somewhat subjective. I encourage you to debate my findings in the comment section if you disagree.

  1. “Christmas Wishes” (Season 8)

Surprise, surprise! “Christmas Wishes” was actually a high point in an otherwise terrible season, but it pales in comparison to most of the other Christmas episodes. The Jim/Dwight plotline deserves credit for putting a new spin on a tired gag, but ultimately the Erin/Andy mess drags the episode down.

It’s easy to forget how much of the show’s later seasons were tied up in the Andy/Erin romance, which was never as interesting as the show wanted it to be (it’s also featured prominently in “Secret Santa” and “Dwight Christmas,” despite the latter’s lack of Andy). This is an entertaining episode, but it’s easy to see why it’s at the bottom of the list.

  1. “Moroccan Christmas” (Season 5)

“Moroccan Christmas” is another Christmas episode that doesn’t get much of its laughs from its A plot. Michael’s attempted intervention for Meredith wasn’t as funny as it could’ve been and probably should have been relegated to a different episode. Phyllis seems somewhat uncharacteristically mean in this episode, though as “Secret Santa” also shows that this tended to happen in isolated cases.

Dwight’s unicorn toy plotline provides the laughs from a storyline perspective. This episode is fueled by superb Kevin and Creed lines and also from Michael’s attempt to invent new mixed drinks such as the orange vod-jus-ka. Depending on how you feel about Andy, his embarrassing moments are also quite entertaining.

  1. “Classy Christmas” (Season 7)

Being hour-long episodes, “Classy Christmas” and “A Benihana Christmas” are somewhat difficult to place as it’s harder to compare them to the regular length episodes. “Classy Christmas” is light on laughs as it focuses primarily on the return of Holly. As her return signaled the beginning of the end for Michael, this is certainly understandable.

It’s effective in its mission to tug at the heartstrings. The Jim/Dwight dynamic is hilarious while the Daryl subplot falls flat. Ultimately there’s enough here to like, but not as much to love. Besides Jim freaking out in the parking lot as he anticipates a mass snowballing from Dwight of course.

  1. “Secret Santa” (Season 6)

This might be the best episode of the Michael and Jim as co-manager era, depending on how you feel about the morality of “Scott’s Tots.” Michael’s reaction to Phyllis as Jesus is Michael at his best. Angela supporting the presence of Jesus at the party was also a great subtle gag.

The episode also does a great job of showcasing some of Dwight’s subtleties. He’s not sparring with Jim or acting especially crazy, but he’s entertaining nonetheless. Phyllis threatening to bring Bob Vance into the equation was also hysterical. The big news of the sale of Dunder Mifflin was a nice touch and didn’t take away from the jokes at all.

  1. “A Benihana Christmas” (Season 3) 

The other Christmas episode to feature Michael feeling sad about a woman is also the other double length episode. This episode is also the first to really showcase Andy’s true character to someone other than Jim and Karen (which isn’t always a good thing). Jim and Pam pull off one of the most memorable Dwight pranks, which was surprising since Jim was dating Karen at the time.

The Jim/Pam tension along with Michael’s somber tone had a lot of potential to derail the laughs. But they’re pretty consistent through the extended episode. The highlight is without a doubt when Michael marks his date with a sharpie to tell her apart from her friend.

  1. “Dwight Christmas” (Season 9)20t49ix

This is the pick I’m going to get the most slack for without a doubt. While the show took a dive after Michael left, season 9 had quite a few standout episodes. But with the exception of the finale, none were as memorable as “Dwight Christmas.”

This episode serves as both a tribute to past Christmas episodes and a reminder as to why these were so cherished in the first place. Dwight’s “traditional” family Christmas was hilarious and the Jim/Pam moments were their highpoint in an otherwise shaky season for the couple. Daryl also shines as he drunkenly broods over Jim’s apparent neglect with regards to the Philadelphia sports job.

  1. “Christmas Party” (Season 2)

This one doesn’t need much explaining. Yankee swap is classic Michael as is his overspending on a gift coupled with his disdain for Phyllis’ homemade oven mitt. Creed’s old man coat rivals Kevin’s foot bath (a gift for himself) for best gift of the episode.

“Christmas Party” also features some of the best Jim/Pam moments and played a big part in their eventual courtship. This episode is more than just the best Christmas episode, it’s one of the best of the whole series. The only thing that could have made it better is if Dwight kept the teapot to use nasally in future episode.

So there are the rankings. Disagree with my order? Comment below. Since it’s the Holiday season, I figure I can get away with pointing out that my book, Five College Dialogues, makes a great gift. Cheers!